Grins & Giggles Gas light? What’s a three-letter word that starts with gas? Car Do you remember when air was free at the gas station, and now it’s $1.50? You know why? Inflation I don’t usually brag about going to expensive places, but I just left the gas station. You may think that you’re saving money at a self-serve gas station…you’re only fueling yourself. Baseball jokes Why was Cinderella taken out of the game by the manager? Because she ran away from the ball. What has 18 legs and catches flies? A baseball team. Why don’t matches play baseball? Because they get one strike and they’re out! What does a baseball player do when his eyesight starts to fail? He gets a job as an umpire. What do you call 40 millionaires sitting around watching the World Series? The New York Yankees! What is the difference between a Royals fan and a baby? The baby stops whining after a while. Is there baseball in heaven? Two old men had been best friends for years, and they both lived to their early 90s. Suddenly, one of them falls deathly ill. His friend comes to visit him on his deathbed; they’re reminiscing about their long friendship when the dying man’s friend asks, “Listen, when you die, do me a favour. I want to know if there’s baseball in heaven.” The dying man said, “We’ve been friends for years – this, I’ll do for you.” And then he dies. A couple of days later, his surviving friend is sleeping when he hears his friend’s voice. The voice says, “I’ve got some good news and some bad news. The good news is that there’s baseball in heaven.” “What’s the bad news?” “You’re pitching tomorrow.” Golfer’s dilemma After a particularly poor game of golf, a popular club member skipped the clubhouse and started to go home. As he was walking to the parking lot to get his car, a policeman stopped him and asked, “Did you tee off on the 16th hole about 20 minutes ago?” “Yes,” the golfer responded. “Did you happen to hook your ball so that it went over the trees and off the course?” “Yes, I did. How did you know?” he asked. “Well,” said the policeman very seriously, “Your ball flew out onto the highway and crashed through a driver’s windshield. The car went out of control, crashing into five other cars and a fire truck. The fire truck couldn’t make it to the fire and the building burned down. So, what are you going to do about it?” The golfer thought it over carefully and responded… “I think I’ll close my stance a little bit, tighten my grip and lower my right thumb.” CSANews | SPRING 2026 | 55
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